We are born with a shapeless, formless mind; a mind enthused to understand how the world works. It realizes one thing very quickly – competition is everywhere. Not all competitions are riddled with entry procedures, nervous breakdowns, or even victory speeches. But they have one thing in common. Whether you win, lose, or merely participate, you will be judged.

Judging is not a real problem, until it becomes a part of your perception. Have you met those who judge you before talking to you? What about those who judge after hearing a rumor? And you surely must have met those who call others judgmental.

Judging is Judging

That day is very far when you won’t be judged for your appearance. Your face, race, height, weight, voice, choice — are all subject to judgment. “Women are bad drivers”, “Guys don’t understand the emotional problems”, “Fat people are ugly”; statements that don’t make logical sense tend to carry a false truth. Judgment Day is when we would get to know our fates; now Judgment Day cometh everyday.

Appearance is one of the many facets of personality that seem to matter. It has now extended to the things you carry along with you. You become ‘cool’ when you own the fruit phone. You may not need it; you may buy it to show that you can afford it. You keep it on the table in meetings; your trouser pockets are big enough to fit a shoe. You know all of the advertised features; you want to prove that you know your phone. You do the same even if you have the space phone. You fight over which is better; you fight over who chose better.

The judgmentality is sown so deep within souls, that it’s growing with us, nourishing itself onto us. It’s a part of our life that we don’t want in others, but want to keep for ourselves. Without it, there are no conclusions, no deductions, no inductions. With it, there are ice breakers at parties, snickering at passersby, rejections at offices.

Being judgmental is often mistaken for being funny. People make snide remarks with sarcasm, and expect others to laugh with them. It might be funny for everyone except the person being made fun of. People tend to appreciate the remarks only if they are not meant for them.

We need to be raised to appreciate the beauty on the inside. That appreciation is lost somewhere. The overwhelming choices of products that claim to make you younger, prettier, handsomer, is increasing. Sadly, and untruly, they also claim to make you better. We are giving way to more options for being judged.

As with everything, there is a fine line between judging and criticizing. The latter, if done correctly, might help you and your friends improve. The former pushes people away from each other. We are already growing in population on a limited land, and getting farther away from each other. Human beings evolved to be social; our rebellions today are making it more difficult to hold on to our roots. How far can we grow without strong foundations? How tall will we stand before the winds bring us down? How long will it be before we accept each other as we are?

We are the missing links of each other. The only way to connect them is to open up, and welcome the difference.

“Be curious, not judgmental.” Walt Whitman (Poet)